Grimm's Household Tales

Three army surgeons who thought they knew their art perfectly were traveling about the world, and they came to an inn where they wanted to spend the night. The host asked where they had come from and where they were going. “We are roaming about the world and practicing our art.” “Just show me for once what you can do,” said the host. Then the first said that he would cut off his hand and put it on again early the next morning; the second said that he would tear out his heart and replace it the next morning; the third said that he would cut out his eyes and heal them again the next morning. “If you can do that,” said the innkeeper, “you have learned everything.” They, however, had a salve with which they rubbed themselves, and it joined parts together, and they constantly carried with them the little bottle that held it. Then they cut the hand, heart, and eyes from their bodies as they had said they would, laid them all together on a plate, and gave it to the innkeeper. The innkeeper gave it to a servant, who was to set it in the cupboard and take good care of it. The girl, however, had a secret lover, who was a soldier. When the innkeeper, the three army surgeons, and everyone else in the house were asleep, the soldier came and wanted something to eat. The girl opened the cupboard and brought him some food, and in her love she forgot to shut the cupboard door again. She seated herself at the table by her lover, and they chattered away together. While she sat there so contentedly, thinking of no bad luck, the cat came creeping in, found the cupboard open, took the hand and heart and eyes of the three army surgeons, and ran off with them. When the soldier had finished eating, and the girl was clearing away the dishes and going to shut the cupboard, she saw that the plate that the innkeeper had given her to take care of was empty. Then she said to her lover in a fright, “Ah, miserable girl that I am, what should I do? The hand is gone, and the heart and the eyes are gone too. What will become of me in the morning?” “Do not worry,” he said. “I will help you out of your trouble. There is a thief hanging outside on the gallows; I will cut off his hand. Which hand was it?” “The right one.” Then the girl gave him a sharp knife, and he went and cut off the poor wretch’s right hand and brought it to her. After this he caught the cat and cut its eyes out, and now nothing but the heart was missing. “Have you not been butchering? Are the dead pigs not in the cellar?” he said. “Yes,” said the girl. “That is good,” said the soldier, and he went down and fetched a pig’s heart. The girl placed everything together on the plate and put it in the cupboard, and when her lover took leave of her after this, she went quietly to bed.

In the morning, when the three army surgeons got up, they told the girl that she was to bring them the plate on which the hand, heart, and eyes were lying. Then she brought it out of the cupboard, and the first fixed the thief’s hand on and smeared it with his salve, and it grew onto his arm at once. The second took the cat’s eyes and put them in his own head. The third fixed the pig’s heart firmly in the place where his own had been, and the innkeeper stood by, admired their skill, and said that he had never yet seen such a thing done and that he would sing their praises and recommend them to everyone. Then they paid their bill and traveled farther.

As they were on their way, the one with the pig’s heart did not stay with them at all, but wherever there was a corner, he ran to it and rooted about in it with his nose as pigs do. The others wanted to hold him back by the tail of his coat, but that did no good; he tore himself loose and ran wherever the dirt was thickest. The second also behaved very strangely; he rubbed his eyes and said to the others, “Comrades, what is the matter? I cannot see at all. Will one of you lead me, so that I do not fall?” Then with difficulty they traveled on until evening, when they reached another inn. They went into the bar together, and there at a table in the corner sat a rich man counting money. The one with the thief’s hand walked around him, made a sudden movement twice with his arm, and at last, when the stranger turned away, he snatched at the pile of money and took a handful from it. One of them saw this and said, “Comrade, what are you doing? You must not steal. Shame on you!” “Eh,” he said, “but how can I stop myself? My hand twitches, and I am forced to snatch things whether I want to or not.”

After this they lay down to sleep, and while they were lying there, it was so dark that no one could see his own hand. All at once the one with the cat’s eyes awoke, aroused the others, and said, “Brothers, just look up. Do you see the white mice running about there?” The two sat up but could see nothing. Then he said, “Things are not right with us; we have not gotten back what is ours. We must return to the innkeeper; he has deceived us.” So the next morning they went back and told the host that they had not gotten back what was their own, and that the first had a thief’s hand, the second cat’s eyes, and the third a pig’s heart. The innkeeper said that the girl must be to blame for that and was going to call her, but when she had seen the three coming, she had run out by the back door and had not come back. Then the three said that he must give them a great deal of money, or they would set his house on fire. He gave them what he had and whatever else he could get together, and the three went away with it. It was enough for the rest of their lives, but they would rather have had their own proper organs.