Grimm's Household Tales

One day a peasant took his good hazel stick out of the corner and said to his wife, “Trina, I am going across country and will not return for three days. If the cattle dealer happens to call during that time and wants to buy our three cows, you may strike a bargain at once, but only if you can get two hundred thalers for them. Nothing less, do you hear?” “For heaven’s sake, just go in peace,” the woman answered. “I will manage that.” “You, indeed,” the man said. “You once fell on your head when you were a little child, and that affects you even now. But let me tell you this: if you do anything foolish, I will make your back black and blue—and not with paint, I assure you, but with the stick that I have in my hand. The coloring will last a whole year, you may rely on that.” Having said that, the man went on his way.

Next morning the cattle dealer came, and the woman had no need to say many words to him. When he had seen the cows and heard the price, he said, “I am quite willing to give that. Honestly speaking, they are worth it. I will take the beasts away with me at once.” He unfastened their chains and drove them out of the cow barn, but just as he was going out through the yard door, the woman clutched him by the sleeve and said, “You must give me the two hundred thalers now, or I cannot let the cows go.” “True,” answered the man, “but I have forgotten to buckle on my money belt. Have no fear, however; you will have security for my payment. I will take two cows with me and leave one, and then you will have a good pledge.” The woman saw the sense in this, let the man go away with the cows, and thought to herself, “How pleased Hans will be when he finds out how cleverly I have managed it!” The peasant came home on the third day, as he had said he would, and at once asked whether the cows had been sold. “Yes, indeed, dear Hans,” answered the woman, “and as you said, for two hundred thalers. They are scarcely worth so much, but the man took them without making any objection.” “Where is the money?” asked the peasant. “Oh, I don’t have the money,” replied the woman. “He happened to forget his money belt, but he will bring it soon, and he left good security behind him.” “What kind of security?” asked the man. “One of the three cows, which he will not have until he has paid for the other two. I have managed very cunningly, for I have kept the smallest, which eats the least.” The man was enraged and lifted up his stick and was just about to give her the beating he had promised her. Suddenly he let the stick fall and said, “You are the stupidest goose that ever waddled on God’s earth, but I am sorry for you. I will go out onto the highways and wait for three days to see if I find anyone who is still stupider than you. If I succeed in doing so, you will go scot-free, but if I do not find such a person, you will receive your well-deserved reward without any discount.”

He went out onto the great highways, sat down on a stone, and waited for what would happen. Then he saw a peasant’s wagon coming toward him, and a woman was standing upright in the middle of it, instead of sitting on the bundle of straw that was lying beside her or walking near the oxen and leading them. The man thought to himself, “That is certainly one of the kind I am looking for,” and jumped up and ran back and forth in front of the wagon like someone who is not very wise. “What do you want, my friend?” the woman said to him. “I don’t know you. Where do you come from?” “I have fallen down from heaven,” replied the man, “and I don’t know how to get back again. Couldn’t you drive me up?” “No,” said the woman, “I don’t know the way, but if you come from heaven, you can surely tell me how my husband, who has been there for three years, is doing. You must have seen him?” “Oh, yes, I have seen him, but not all men can get along well. He keeps sheep, and the sheep keep him very busy. They run up the mountains and lose their way in the wilderness, and he has to run after them and drive them together again. His clothes are all torn to pieces too, and will soon fall off his body. There is no tailor there, because Saint Peter won’t let any of them in, as you know from the story.” “Who would have thought it?” the woman cried. “I tell you what: I will fetch his Sunday coat, which is still hanging at home in the cupboard. He can wear that and look respectable. You will be so kind as to take it with you.” “That won’t do very well,” answered the peasant. “People are not allowed to take clothes into heaven; they are taken away from everyone at the gate.” “Then listen,” said the woman. “I sold my fine wheat yesterday and got a good deal of money for it. I will send that to him. If you hide the purse in your pocket, no one will know that you have it.” “If you can’t manage it any other way,” said the peasant, “I will do you that favor.” “Just sit still where you are,” she said, “and I will drive home and fetch the purse. I will soon be back again. I do not sit down on the bundle of straw but stand up in the wagon, because it makes it lighter for the cattle.” She drove her oxen away, and the peasant thought, “That woman has a perfect talent for folly. If she really brings the money, my wife may consider herself fortunate, for she will get no beating.” It was not long before she came in a great hurry with the money and with her own hands put it in his pocket. Before she went away, she thanked him again a thousand times for his courtesy.

When the woman got home again, she found her son, who had come in from the field. She told him what unexpected things had happened to her and then added, “I am truly delighted to have found an opportunity to send something to my poor husband. Who would ever have imagined that he could be suffering for lack of anything up in heaven?” The son was full of astonishment. “Mother,” he said, “it is not every day that a man comes from heaven in this way. I will go out immediately and see if he is still to be found. He must tell me what it is like up there and how the work is done.” He saddled the horse and rode off with all speed. He found the peasant, who was sitting under a willow tree and was just about to count the money in the purse. “Have you seen the man who has fallen down from heaven?” the youth cried to him. “Yes,” answered the peasant, “he has set out on his way back there. He has gone up that hill, from where it is somewhat closer. You could still catch up with him if you rode fast.” “Alas,” said the youth, “I have been doing tiring work all day, and the ride here has completely worn me out. You know the man; be so kind as to get on my horse and go and persuade him to come here.” “Aha!” thought the peasant, “here is another who has no wick in his lamp!” “Why should I not do you this favor?” he said, and he mounted the horse and rode off at a quick trot. The youth remained sitting there until night fell, but the peasant never came back. “The man from heaven must certainly have been in a great hurry and would not turn back,” he thought, “and the peasant has no doubt given him the horse to take to my father.” He went home and told his mother what had happened, and that he had sent his father the horse so that he would not have to run about all the time. “You have done well,” she answered. “Your legs are younger than his, and you can go on foot.”

When the peasant got home, he put the horse in the stable beside the cow that he had as a pledge, and then went to his wife and said, “Trina, as your luck would have it, I have found two who are still sillier fools than you. This time you escape without a beating; I will store it up for another occasion.” Then he lit his pipe, sat down in his grandfather’s chair, and said, “It was a good stroke of business to get a sleek horse and a great purse full of money into the bargain for two lean cows. If stupidity always brought in as much as that, I would be quite willing to hold it in honor.” So the peasant thought, but you no doubt prefer the simple-minded folks.